Title: super bass as read by google translate
Played: 661339 times

merlin-the-last-dragon-lord:

thisclosetstoosmall:

the-average-gatsby:

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This post is life

I AM CRYING :’)


flyingonthefriendshipship:

Would you kill him in his bed?
Thrust a dagger through his head?
I would not, could not, kill the King.
I could not do that evil thing. 
I would not wed this girl, you see.
Now get her to a nunnery.

~ Green Eggs and Hamlet 

wanderlust1979:

omegaling:

I can vouch that all morticians have the same sense of humor.

Saving lives all over the place!! Thanks dude.

un-feuilly-de-papier:

un-feuilly-de-papier:

What do french people call a really bad thursday?

a trajeudi

just-laff:

egberts:

if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that whenever i bought something i’d always have the right amount of money to pay for it in my pocket

you are one of the great thinkers of our time

therealeovaldez:

hypergiants:

pulpofiction:

Life hack: if someone makes a racist/sexist joke, say, with total seriousness, “I don’t get it, can you explain it”

Then watch them crash and burn

"…And then I said, ‘go make me a sandwich!’ haw haw haw."

"I don’t get it."

"What’s not to get."

"Why would she make you a sandwich?"

"Because… She’s a girl."

"You can’t make yourself a sandwich?"

"I can make myself a sandwich."

"Cool, go make me one too."

[Smooth Criminal plays]

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